Wer weiss was kommen wird!

After finally waking up at 7.30 in the morning, taking a shower while figuring out what to wear, doing my hair and throwing on some mascara and lip gloss, trying to leave the house at 8.10 while still figuring out which shoes to wear. Finally in my car at around 8.15 speeding down the streets of this beautiful area I am leaving soon, getting into the office and to my des at around 8.35, this how it has been the last 2 weeks!!! I have been having a really big problem getting up lately, and it seems like I am always in a rush. A friend of mine told me ”Jen good things come to those who wait” thank you for that JoJo!
It’s true!!!! I found an apartment, it is a beautiful 3 bedroom, but I have to say the floors are ugly! I will have to live with a room mate, but that’s fine for now, she is a cool girl! And the best thing is that I can move in on
When I heard the news that I was approved for the apt. I was so happy I started to cry, haha! The last few months have just been a bit too much for me, and this is good news! It did hit me though, moving out of my comfort zone in to a totally different area. I am a bit scarred but, it can only get better from here on. Who knows what the future has in store for me?!

Human being

Right now it’s right
Right now it’s good
Nothing is really right
High tide comes after low tide

At the beach of life
Without a reason without common sense
Nothing is forgiven
I am building dreams on the sand

It is ok everything is fine
It’s all coming together
And the sun is shining
Light and free

The human being is called human being
Because he forgets, because he is amazed
Because he warms up when he talks
Because he laughs
He is living
But you are missing

The sky is open
Cloudless and blue
Share your peace with me
Even if it’s only borrowed
I don’t want your love
I just want your word

The human being is called human being
Because he makes mistakes and he fights
Because he hopes and he loves
Because he believes, comforts and trust you
Because he laughs he lives
But you are missing
J.W

The killers- when you were young

I listened to this song nonstop today at work. Love it, really good!!!

Corinne Bailey Rae

So this is what happend this week!

This week, just like the last ones seem to fly by. It is already thursday again, and it's a rainy thursday!

So this whole crazy situation with the ex was finally settled on Tuesday in court. I actually have not written about it on here, because I wasn’t in the right place of mind. But now I am, and I am very happy about it. Let me just give you a bit of information. DON’T ever try to live with your ex. There is a reason why he is your ex. For me it was a different situation, because I had no1 to go to argh…. Anyway just to make it short, I became the victim of domestic violence!
Everything is good now, and the sun is starting to shine again. Next step, finding a new apt. because I want to get out of there, too many bad memories.
Besides that everything is coming back together again! On my way to work this morning, Betsey’s ( my car ) check engine light went on. Oh that little bitch!!! She just got a new transmission, which didn’t fit into my finances! She was going to go back to the mechanic at the end of the month for a new starter and boil joints ( something like that). But now she is going in today, that little bitch, hope it’s nothing 2 bad! I have to say the year of 2007 has not really been a good year for me. It feels like God is testing me, I had way to many obstacles so far, but I learned that stressing, and making myself crazy doesn’t help. And it made me feel really good about myself managing as well as I did. If there is more I should go through this year, I am so ready for it BRING IT ON!
I didn’t write for a while, so below you see something I actually just wrote.

Say it out loud

Say it out loud
that you love me
Say it out loud
That you will give me everything
Say it out loud
That I mean everything to you
Say it out loud
Because I fell like it right now

Do you hear what I am saying?
Do you know what I want?
Do you get my question?
You know what I want
Nothing will happen
Not even one finger will touch you
My life will protect you
You won’t get hurt

I will break chains
If we will get separated
More iron is being mixed into my blood
Your flame burns inside of me
I will always listen to
What you heart is telling me
Just say it out loud
J.W

Fall

The weather is finally cooling a bit of. I do enjoy the summer, but I am so tired of the nasty humidity. Other people think that the summer is just starting, but I am thankful it's almost over, and I believe that my trip to the Bahamas has something to do with that, too much heat. I mean I went to the beach and pool quite often, got a beautiful tan, that's all I needed.

This weekend we had really beautiful weather. On saturday I went out to the counrty. It was so beautiful, sunny with a little breeze. Really relaxing, strolling through the fields and woods. I was talking to my moms yesterday and she was telling me that she went berry picking, and that she was making juice and jams. I wish I could do that here too. I know I must sound weird to some, but I love doing things like that. One day when I have my little house somewhere in the country....ok Jen time to wake up!

Soon the apple time will be here, and they will be selling tasty apples at the farmers market. And I will be mostly outside horseback writing.

The leafs are going to change their colors and everything is going to look red orange and golden.

When I was a nanny I would take Emily ( that was our standard poodle) for really long walks. Although we lived in the suburbs it was really country. Every moning we would go running for almost 2 hours, and in the afternoon we would go for walks. Seeing how everything changes, from the trees to the animals getting ready for the winter, always amazed me.

Of course I am looking forward to the beautiful colors that the fashion world has to offer for this year. Chocolate brown and deep purple, beautiful colors.

This morning while waking up, I had a big smile on my face. It was really dark out, and on the weaterh channel it said that we are only having a high 65 today yippie!

Immaculate Conception

So this might be too much for some of you, ha it was for my pops, but I don’t care because I write whatever I think on here.
Since Friday I have been feeling really sick. My breasts are really swollen hot and about a cup size bigger! I have been having the craziest abdominal pain ever, plus I am an emotional wreck. So at first I thought, hmmm maybe it’s the time of the month, but no that can’t be because I am in the middle of my cycle.
I spoke with my moms about the “hot tits” issue and the google queen gave me a lot of advises.
Last night I found myself over the toilet throwing up. Oh no what the hell is going on with me? Silly me could barely sleep because I was thinking almost the whole night. Oh no what if I was actually pregnant??? Here is the thing though I AM NOT unless it’s a immaculate conception, like the virgin Mary!
I’ll be fine! I am going to the doc. on Saturday and hope she can help me, or like my google queen says” it happens in the middle of your cycle, your body isn’t a machine and it is always different”
Hmmmm Immaculate conception!!!!!!!!!
Honestly I think that’s all bull! I am a catholic, and went to catholic private schools but never really believed in Jesus. The older I got through the years the more I thought about it. I do believe that he was alive, but I don’t believe all the stories about him.
I was always more interested in the Old Testament. I remember when I was 9 years old, and had to learn so much about the bible due to my communion. I was the only catholic girl in my class (mostly people in northern Germany are protestant) and I knew everything in religion class. My class mates were quite annoyed because the teacher had me explain and tell them a lot. I loved reading about Abraham, Isaac, Sara ….I truly believe and go by the Old Testament.
I could go on and on, specially me, I am so into religions, but I’ll leave it exactly where it is!

Mad World

Usually I try to see everything quite positiv. But after reading the paper online today, it just really hit me!

Chocolate prices set to rise

Germans have been worried recently about rising milk prices. But now chocolate too is set to get more expensive as raw materials go up in price. The crunch will be felt before Christmas, says one leading manufacturer.

Now what the f is that all about??? Just because the chinese people don't have enough cows, and Germans are so greety for money!!!

That's just bad, maybe good because I won't eat and buy as much when I am home!

Frantic hunt in Iraq bomb rubble

Rescuers in Iraq are digging through rubble to find survivors of four bombs that killed at least 200 people.
The attacks devastated an area home to the Yazidi, a Kurdish religious sect, near the northern city of Mosul, and left more than 200 people injured.
Officials on the scene said the number of those killed and wounded was expected to rise.
The US military blamed al-Qaeda for the bombs, and acknowledged that tackling insurgent attacks was a difficult task.

"Because of the inaction of the government in Baghdad and their inability to protect the population they are suffering the way they are now"
Khaled SalihKurdistan regional government

A deadly Mafia export from Italy

In the first-ever case of southern Italy's mafia exporting a vendetta to another country, six men were killed in the German city Duisburg on Wednesday morning after being fired at more than 70 times. The victims were reportedly members of feuding mafia clans that have been clashing for years in Italy's Calabria region.

Slavery in China

It's a story that has made headlines around the world:Slave laborers have been found in Chinese brick factories. The authorities have freed many of them, but some fear there could be hundreds more being imprisoned, beaten and starved. Some parents have begun searching for their sons on their own.

Bert Stern

Although I would always prefer Audrey Hepburn over Marilyn, I love this shot of her, LOVE IT!

I wonder what's so different!

This weekend was quite quiet! I am back to my old routine, at least I am getting there. I really didn’t do much, I felt sick and really tired, so I honestly spent most of my weekend in my bed, and studied.
I was relaxing and thinking about changes that will happen in my life soon, and have been happening so far. I am so excited about all this!

I was also thinking about a really good night out I had a few weeks ago and the different kind of attention I have been getting lately.
I went to a flat party with my friend Liz. We didn’t stay long and decided to go pub/bar hopping with some other people that were there also. I was introduced to a few people, but 2 of them were standing out, David and Wills. They stared at me nonstop , which for me was quite awkward. While walking to the first bar, I talked to Wills after he had complimented me on my dress, David showed up and was like, aren’t you a model? LOL me a model!!!! Wills agreed, and said that they have def. seen me before and not once. Liz overheard them and told them that that is the most cheesiest line ever. But those two were actually serious.
Liz and I were quite bored at the bars, weird people I tell you, so we decided to leave. As we were saying bye Wills shouted out, now I know where I saw you! I was on a flight form London to Rome and saw you in a magazine for a Prada add! I told him again that I wasn’t a model! He didn’t believe me, and said it’s ok and he understands that I don’t want to brag about it.
Ha those two guys were so happy and gave me a quite tight hug. Listen though I am not a MODEL!!!
From there we went to a lounge were the two of us had a lot of fun. We had Martinis yuck, I only had half, so nasty, plus I was so happy when this one guy bumped in to me and half of it spilled. I noticed a lot of females staring at me. I really hate it because a lot of females are bitches. I have to say that I do compliment other females, there is no need to hate. But those stares were for something else. Two actually came up to me and started talking to me. Yes lesbians, ha!!! That has been happening quite often lately, I don’t know what’s so different about me. The last few weeks I have little boys and chicks coming up to me.

Tired of you

I actually don't have much to say. This week is flying by, and I just have to note a few things. All I have been doing is working, working, studying, and working out. I haven't felt this good in a long time. Although there will be no real time for my social life I am loving it. I haven't worked out like this in a long time gee twice a day, and my body is killing me! Ha I feel like you can pop of my legs, but it feels awesome. Yeah I know must sound sick, but I am just in the best mood ever today. Plus I am listening nonstop to the Foo Fighters, it's on repeat on my ipot.

I love you Dave.....haha

This weekend was all about music, dancing and lots of fun

Love this song!!!!

When she writes

When she writes her heart starts to glow
You can recognize feelings, emotions and colors
And feel them through looking into her eyes
What can I say she forms letters with the pen
Some days she throws away what she wrote- because she hates her writing
But still she writes down what she hears
She can hear him too
The scream that is telling her that she is lost
The dimmed light from the moon is shining through the trees
She writes it down because she has no more dreams
She already forgot the point of writing
Almost possessed she is drawing the words and is writing the pictures
Without any consideration and believes she is closing her eyes in this silence
Her soul in her body is trying to rob the strength of her life
Through the lines on her paper
You say that you know her world but you don’t even know your own
She writes until your legs start running
And wraps your end up in rhymes
What a beautiful sight that gives you
The view of the beautiful dreams in her heart
The happiness when she writes

J.W

Natural blues

Most favorite video!!!

What it really means

So this post is going to be a bit different I think. Right now I am sitting at my desk, drinking my tasty coffee and am actually supposed to do something totally different. But something just popped in my head, which I want to write down before i forget!
The title of this post has something to do with missing something, to be more certain about it, the meaning.What it means to me, and even others.
Yesterday while sitting in the office, the UPS man stopped by,who has like the biggest crush on me, really annoying. Anyway he didn't have anything for me, but still came in to tell me that he misses me. Then this morning he stopped by again and asked me if I heard him yesterday. Dude you're annoying, seriously.
Anyway, what does it actually mean to him when he says that?

When people say they miss you, do they really mean it?
I do!!!!
So yesterday in a session I was kind of thinking about what I truly and really miss, right now!
I miss my family to a certain extend and my friends....
I miss to love and really care for a person.
I have been at a point where I was really looking for something like that.
That was at the end of my relationship. Being all desperate and in a way looking for a rebound. That is normal, thank God it didn't happen to me!
Everything takes time, and it will come to you when you are ready for it!
Missing something or someone, can be hard. But you'll learn how to handle the situation and you'll become patient.
What does it mean to you???